Wintriest Nights

Your eyes, pupils
Black holes to the

                          Unknown.

To the all knowing.

The answers,
           surrounded by brown,
white,
                              and lashes.

A touch bringing silence, only
sounds of breath;
the exchange

                    of life
slowly seeping from your lips

I kiss.

Lost in it, the melting
                          of snow
I'm made of.





This is
        what they write about,
sing about,

long for,

                            die for,

live for.


This is...

Poison Without a Name

Lyrics:

Mother, Mother, Mother.
Lay me down and I will sprout
A willow tree.

So I can weep for eternity.

Cause it's spreading. It's spreading. It's spreading!
This poison, this poison without a name.

Mother, Mother, Mother.

I want to cry

All the damn time.

I don't know why.
But I'll smile when I look at you.

You're the moon and the stars,

the forests in between.

You're everything.

You're everything to me.

But it's spreading. It's spreading. It's spreading!

This poison, this poison without a name.

It's got me questioning everything.

Mother, Mother, Mother.
Lay me down and I will sprout
A willow tree.

I'll Always Love You in the Fall

Lyrics:

My love for you the phases of the moon.

So full of light when it's full.

But I've come anew and it's time for you to go, go, go, go.

But I'll always love you in the fall. (x4)

Let's not shed any tears tonight.

We've put up quite the fight.

She has other plans for me,

I know you can see.

But I'll always love you in the fall. (x4)

So we'll go, go, go

to the beat of our fallen love. (x3)

Titanic Tragedies

You used to be so tender;
the summer misting rain;
gentle, slowing washing
away my pain.

Tonight I sit distant,
questioning what I have to do
to feel that closeness
I once felt with you.

I’m chipping at this iceberg
with a bamboo spoon,
wondering how long till
I’m near enough.

But you’re floating away now
and there’s nothing I can do.

There’s nothing I can do.

I’ve opened myself
like the ugly flower in bloom.
I have yet to see
more than a glimpse of you
.

Here I am alone, naked
in front of you.

You have nothing to say.

You have nothing to say.

Feels like…

I’m chipping at this iceberg
with a bamboo spoon,
wondering how long till
I’m near enough.

But you’re floating away now.
There’s nothing I can do.

There’s nothing I can do.

You have nothing to say and
there’s nothing I can do.
There’s nothing I can do.

Kamacchanda

There is a knot tying. Each pull
and tighten burns, releasing

Nothing.

It holds it in;
Ties it down.

It.
It…

A desire to stand

                                still.

This life leaves no room.
There is no time

to gander,
to wonder,
seek, discover.

Only to-do lists, followed by
still haven’t done lists, followed
by endless tiredness.

Revive me.

Fill me with the rains
like empty pots.

Brush away the cobs, the dust
that fills my airways,

for I cannot breathe.

Let me live.

Live.

Mother,

show me how to live.

I have been deceived, only knowing
money, greed; only knowing

how to separate from you

though I know only you

                                                are
                                                                life.

The Ocean in the Sky

The swirls swell deep in my soul.

                                I feel

                them press at my palms,
attempting to breathe,

flow back into the universe.

                                I am

                that space, this universe,
Earth, world, cosmos and all.

It all flows within me.

                                I will be

                peace for all humanity.

E

It’s found in silence,
in the slow fall of snowflakes,
the wind brushing between beings,
blowing leaves, whistling.

It’s found in the strum of strings,
the deep chords that bellow
from the throat.

It’s found in the green
of trees, their whispers to me.

It’s found in everything.

Namaste _/||\_

Show me your faults
and I shall accept you,
                for they are not faults
rather echoes of myself
beating in you.

We are one.

We both fear. We think
with separate minds
that work in the same plane,

producing thoughts, little flickers
of energy that spill into the world
and cling to further minds.

We are not original.

We are not unique.

We are not superior.

We
are
one.

We are the same.

The pain felt by the elder tree
being separated from her roots,
I feel
                in me.

I feel the cut,
                the parting,
                                 the fall.

My soul is not
my intelligence.

My feelings are not
my perception.

My connection is not
my mind.

Intelligence
is wrongly measured
by miles of divorce.

My heart
                is no bigger than yours
or his. We are all capable.

We are all framed
                                to see

without sight.

My first knits

This Scares Me

Lyrics:

I want to be the moon in your eyes.
I want you to see me in the most beautiful light.
I might even let you find…
My heart is buried deep inside of me.

But this you already see.
You see right through me,
and this scares me.
Oh, this scares me.

How did you have me all figured out
when  you didn’t know what I was all about,
but you somehow have visited all
the places inside me
that nobody’s ever seen.

This scares me.
Oh, this scares me.

I don’t know what you see in me.                                                          
The more you see the more I believe
you could be the one for me.

Oh, this scares me.
Oh, this scares me.

I want to be the moon in your eyes.
I want you to see me in the most beautiful light. 

My Happy Song

Lyrics:

Watching the clouds go by
realizing this thing called time.
Oh, how it flies right on by
while I’m sitting here smiling.
I’m sitting here smiling.

The sun’s shining down on me,
while I’m singing.
So, I’m sitting here just smiling.
I’m sitting here smiling.

Watching the wind blow by,
how it sways the grass so high.
I’m listening to the creatures singing with me now
while I’m sitting here smiling.
I’m sitting here smiling.

Now the lady bugs are crawling on me,
thinking to myself how lucky can I be
to live in this world of beauty, beauty.

So I’m sitting here just smiling.
Playing my guitar and smiling.
I’m sitting here and smiling.
Playing my guitar and smiling.

Get Drunk

Lyrics:

Get drunk.
Tell me you love.
Say it to me again.
Let it sink into my skin.

Let the rain
pour upon our faces.
Tell me your secrets
that you never say.
Just tell me your secrets.

Show me, open the door
to your mind.
Show me your heart,
but I can't guarentee I'll show you mine.
But I'll try. I'll try.

So get drunk.
Tell me you love.
Say it to me again.
Let it sink into my skin.

How 'bout we wear our hearts
on our sleeves, our sleeves.
'Cause think I'm falling
in love, in love.
Oh, I think I'm falling
in love with you, with you.

December Day

Lyrics:

How we laid beneath the clouds,
lighting and thunder an echo
of ourselves; the sound playing out
but the flash is gone.

Oh, I'll see you tomorrow.
I'll see you tomorrow,
when the winter rolls in.

I kiss your lips from far away,
dreaming of that December day
I'll come walking in as if I never left.

Oh, I'll see you tomorrow.
I'll see you tomorrow,
when the winter rolls in.
Our August sun has set
but it will rise again.

And we'll stay up all night
till the sun comes up again;
just like those summer nights
let the sun seep in
through shades and sheets.
Oh, it filled us with such love.
Love don't forget,
though I'm distant from you now,
I'll see you again.

Oh, I'll see you tomorrow.
I'll see you tomorrow.
Let the sun rise again.

Umbilical Cord of Heart and Mind

Through a field of lilies
she strolls.
The forest ahead,
an ocean below;
deeper she goes.

The shade becomes dark;
only fireflies glow.
(only fireflies glow)

What do you know?
Tell me secrets of this life.
What is this yearning
that lingers inside?

Fireflies glow.
The fireflies glow.

They scatter,
she shadows;
deeper she goes
till there is light
where a sunflower grows.
(a sunflower grows)

What do you know?
Tell me secrets of this life.
What am I missing
that haunts me at night?

And the sunflower sings
as the fireflies glow

Let the wind lead the way,
let it render you free.
This is no life
in which you lead.

See the beauty in me
bloom in those willing to be

your somebody.

You’re somebody.

Catching Trains

This distance brings me closer. I can feel
you in my chest, pump my heart, release
                                             my breath.

When you cannot be beside, you are
everywhere to me. I see you
in the stars,                initials carved
                   into invisible trees.

Not being able to feel you so close,
you become closer to me (youme).
                  I needed this distance
to let you inside of me. (myoue)

I'll bear my heart, wear it on my sleeve.
I am committed now
                               that I had to leave.

Maybe the longing is a necessity; you
showing me how much this means;
a                    thousand miles
won't stop you from loving me,

(when those before stopped suddenly).

I'll give you my love
                              unconditionally,
for you are far better than I could dream,
                                          (deserve).

I'll do my best
to make my heart heard. Let
her speak freely, finally, though only
                 to your non-judging ears
that hold my whispers gently.

I could tell you dark secrets from the past,
and you don't sit there
                                  feeling bad. You say
I'm beautiful for all I do, how I see
the world, how I see you

and all those close to me,
      how there is beauty in all to see.
Somehow you manage
                                    to see it in me.

Pursuit of the Quiet Mind

Gazing into the night, you are
within the shooting star;
at the end of the midnight rainbow.

Climbing the highest tree, I see
you in the greenest, dying leaf.
But you disappear from me;

vanishing upon waves of wind.

Adrift a field of sunflowers, I find you.
Successfully capturing the self,
we soar beyond clouds inside ocean tides.

Invisible Names Carved into a Tree (Destiny?)

I was sitting in a tree when a bird came up to me to say hello. Little did I know this birdie had a plan for me, though too soon for my eyes to see. So, I went here every day and so did she till one day when the skies were cloudy. She did not come but instead a man quite young and lovely sat beneath my tree, slowly unraveling her plan for me you see. He pulled out his guitar not seeing me above and sang the most beautiful song about love. As a tear dropped from my cheek he looked up questioning rain but saw me in my happiest pain. His cheeks became red in regards to the things he’d said so I dropped down and whispered, “Let’s get out of these clouds and trees that we’ve been hiding behind for weeks. Take me out. Let’s have a new beginning.”

Warped Splendor

Vines in spines made

of moons and tunes,
sun flower and gun powder,
many pieces of you.

Half-moon leaves
when sun flowers breathe,
wilting to starless nights,
empty thriving trees.

Here on this vine embodied
deep in my spine, moon
leaves of trees and sun
flowers weave through

the endless beauty
flourishing within you.

Haiku Series

Staring at paper
she feels so trapped inside it.
Autumn leaves blow by.

Bright lit screen fades her
in ways she never could see.
Sunlight appears dark.

Grocery lists say
do this and that till gone
while day waits to play.

Branches sing and dance.
She passes by without eyes.
They lost her to work.

Lotus Wings

This is one of my first attempts at watercolor painting.