Oh Love

Lyrics:

Oh love, where have you been?
I’ve been waiting for you, pick me up again.

Oh love, it’s been so long
since you’ve shown your face here.

Come home to my heart.
Without you here it’s quite dark.

Oh love, where have you been?
I’ve been waiting for you, pick me up again.

Oh love, the sun shines a little brighter
when you here beside me

And the stars light up my darkest skies

Oh love, I’ve been missing you.

Oh love, where have you been?
Come home, pick me up again.

Discovering My Place in Deep Breaths

One cannot deny the beauty that in each breathe surrounds us. In each breath, I breathe it in, fully allowing it to seep into my bones. The beauty not only visible, but in sounds of an exhale like flowing water, pure; In smells of a deep breath, lilacs and rose bushes, my salty skin; In feelings of my breath upon my lip, wind upon my cheek, grass beneath my toes; feeling of my heart beat, sound of my heart beat, vision of my heart beat among the tree tops. My body does not end at my fingertips, my painted toes. I extend into all beings, into the belly of the Earth, the eyes of animals, the heart of the sky, the ear of the human. Everywhere is where I reside, space and time.

Mixed Emotions on Guitar

You want to know what’s in my heart,
well hate and love and all the above.
Right now I’m a sweetheart
but I can’t guarantee that tomorrow.
Tomorrow I may be feeling dark
and sing songs of exes I don’t want to remember.
‘Cause I love them and I hate them.
I’m thankful and regretful.
Wish they were here and that’d I’d never see them again.
‘Cause in this heart I just don’t know.
It’s like a rollercoaster rainbow.

And these are just my mixed emotions on guitar.
Yeah, it’s just mixed emotions on guitar.

Sure, one day I want to fall in love
the next I can’t imagine being bound,
tied down, my dreams are all I want
until it gets dark and in my bed I lay
alone, feeling that cold. But hell,
I don’t need a man to make me feel
any sort of happiness or smile
so who really knows what I want,
‘cause I sure as hell don’t.

And these are just my mixed emotions on guitar.
Yeah, it’s just mixed emotions on guitar.

Appreciating a Freedom Fought For

How fortunate I am to be–
to be a lady
held in a position
of making hard decisions.

My life I lead–my own direction.

Nothing to tie me down,
Nothing to hold me back,
just me and my visions

on the search for the right path.

There is a freedom in my mind,
something I can’t describe, when
I know no matter which way
I go, happiness I will find,

Because my options are unlimited.

You Might Be

Lyrics:

I want to feel the love
that comes from that only one.
I do.
He could make me feel so good
like the summer breeze in my hair, yeah

But in the moment, I’ll just dream,
think of the man you might be.
And I’ll picture myself held in your arms,
kissing your lips beneath those stars,
every night.

Yeah, you’d taste so good to me
treat me like the angel I try to be.
And I’d rub your feet for you every night
sing you songs under that full moon light.
I swear I would.

But in the moment, I’ll just dream,
think of the man you might be.
And I’ll picture myself held in your arms,
kissing your lips beneath those stars,
every night.

Yeah, I know I was given two hands
so I could hold my own, and
being with you won’t make me feel
any less alone,
but darling, oh sweet darling
I want you.

So I’ll just continue to dream,
think of the man you might be.
I’ll just continue to dream,
think of the man you might be.
I wonder who you’ll be.
Who will you be.

Finding a Part of Me

I’m finding more in myself
my father, who I thought I
had nothing in common.

But being so far away
I’m beginning to miss home.
Great distances for great spans
may not be what I’m made for,

just like my father.

I wish to have my land,

as he only wanted, where
I can feel a certain freedom.

I long to have my animals,
as he always did, to care
for and love, make use of.

And gardens all about, roses,
his favorite, lining all around.
Vegetables too, just like
we used to always do.

It’s the simple things I find
we both love; walking
about the grass, admiring
a budding apple tree.

It’s funny to me, to find
myself so far from home
and realize it’s not only
his blood that is my own.

Illusions Lost to the Dark

I lay here bare in the night
pretending you are beside me;
your fingertips grazing my skin,
a delicate kiss upon my shoulder.

I roll over to see your face–
Nothing but darkness,
an empty space–an image
of my lonely heart.

Reminded you are just
a dream I’m waiting to hold
I roll over once more, see
all I have are my goals.

Contemplating a Milestone

One year–
                So much has happened,
changed,
since I made you walk away.

.

One year–
                I still think of you every day,
sing
songs to ease my lingering pain.

One year–
                I wish I could call you,
see…
Know if you are okay.

One year–
                I realize you never knew
me.
I could not be myself–someone else.

One year–
                I celebrated my leaving– my
coming
such a long way from those burning days.

One year–
                I’m still finding my way without
you.
But I know without you is the right way.

Fury in my Sweet-Heart

Deep down a lover resides– a shoulder
to lean on in the hardest of times.

A sweet man, he wants to help but

inside he tries to hold something back.
It builds, builds, builds…

Heavy, hard brick walls built upon a branch.

Each breath he takes the wind beats harder,
skeletal branch becomes weaker.

Once more he snaps–black–
left with regrets,
while walls continue to build.

Webs Within

Tangled up in decisions
to be made. Knowledge
of what is right, what is
wrong– Obvious.

I know what my choice

shall be, but sometimes
wrong decisions feel so right–

feed that urge,

cure that crave.

Yet the true question 

is–in the end will I be happy.

It is clear to see, happy

is not what I’ll be but left
craving more of something

I can’t have.

Though this closeness

with you fills some gaps
and holes in my life of desires, it’s temporary.

My biggest hole of all

you cannot fill in any ways.

Love you cannot give me.

Slowly, I untangle–

walk to the right.

Baby, Be Mine

Lyrics

I don’t care if your heart is cold,
or if you’ve made mistakes before.
I’m going to love you anyways,
more than I ever could before.

Now, we may have seen love before
and it hurt us both, yeah we were torn
but I won’t leave you that way.
Promise I will never stray.

Cause, baby I’m telling you,
I know you want to be with me too
and this is something we shouldn’t deny.
So come over here and be my guy.

Cause, I don’t care if your heart is cold,
or if you’ve made mistakes before.
I’m going to love you anyways,
more than I ever could before.

Because I see something in you,
I hope you see it in me too.
It’s something I can’t deny.
Baby, I want to make you mine.

The way you look at me with those eyes
and give me the most beautiful smile
I know this is meant to be,
forever you and me.

Yeah, you never leave my mind.
It’s only you all the time.
And for you “I’d walk the line”
‘cause honestly you’re my perfect guy.

Yeah, I don’t care if your heart is cold,
or if you’ve made mistakes before.
I’m going to love you anyways,
more than I ever could before.

Because I see something in you,
I hope you see it in me too.
It’s something I can’t deny.
Baby, I want to make you mine.
Oh mine.
I want to make you mine.
Yeah, mine.

Oh, I’ll never make you cry,
so, baby, just be mine.
Be mine, oh be mine.
Baby, be mine

Blooming in Forgiveness

Today will be the day
I forgive the pain
caused to me.
You are only human.

And today will be the day
I forgive myself too
because I don’t only
blame you.

This grudge is wearing
me thin–keeping me
victim–that’s not what I am.

But with these forgiveness’s
I’ll be reborn.
Let lotuses bloom in me,
sunflowers no more.

Caution: Not All Words Are Truth

You may think some poems
are directed at you
but I’ll let you know,
it’s not completely true.

These are just words
that come from my heart
and some don’t make sense
for my life, they are just fill-ins
to make better art.

So when I say,
Don’t lose your chance with me
I’m not really talking to you–
in all honesty,
I may never stop wanting you.

So pick and choose
what words are meant for you.
I’ll give you a hint
which ones might be true–

Ones where I say
my feelings for you;
I’m here in the stars, sitting with the moon–

So just keep smiling for me
the way you always do,
and I’ll keep writing poems
inspired by a lovely you.

Get Out of My World

lyrics

In these shadows I cast upon the walls
I hope to see your face
but it’s an empty room
and all I do is pace.

Waiting for a phone to ring, 

hear your voice again.
Waiting for you to break in,
steal me from myself again,

[Chorus]

‘Cause I’m lost and confused
without you here,
telling me how it is
making me believe something untrue.

And I am scared to make it alone
but that’s what I’m doing,
trying every day
to empty you from my world.

So, get out of my world.
You’re not welcomed here no more.

No, I don’t really miss you
or long to have you here.
I know I’d die from your kisses
always laced with poisons.

It’s a crazy thing this broken heart,
I’m trying to let it go,
unravel this maze you left behind
in my hideously tainted mind.

[Chorus]

‘Cause I’m lost and confused
without you here,
telling me how it is
making me believe something untrue.

And I’m scared to make it alone
but that’s what I’m doing,
trying every day
to empty you from my world.

So, get out of my world.
You’re not welcomed here no more.

In time I’ll forget you were even here.
No longer will you haunt my every dream,
fighting and further ruining me.
‘Cause tonight I’m letting you go,
I’m letting you go.
I’m letting you go

So I won’t be lost and confused
without you here,
telling me how it is
making me believe something untrue.

I’m no longer scared
to make it alone
to empty you,
empty you from my world.

Yeah, get out of my world.
You’re not welcomed here no more
Get out of my world.
You’re not welcomed here no more.

Dear Heart of Mine

I know you feel so much pain and you hold grudges. I understand you are still upset, and with good reason– it is never fair when someone hurts you so. My heart, I see you are still deeply wounded, still bleeding day and night and it won’t stop. I see the anger that is building up from your lack of healing, the lack of care I have shown you. My mind has become well, but I left you here with sorrow and despair. I have not tried to help you become whole again, see the sun rise and fall again– in the dark I have left you. You see, my heart, you always were so strong, always able to take it all on and I didn’t think I needed to help you as I did my mind. You’ve always healed yourself in time and I could clearly see my mind was faulting me and that needed to change immediately. But you, you sat and waited patiently for me to come with my gauze and Band-Aids of love and help you heal. You waited and waited and I had not shown. I fooled myself into thinking you were fine. But I realize, you are still waiting, still hurting from those days that caused us pain. I am here now though, my heart. I am ready to see you for what you are, accept your invitation for help. With you I will sit and see–no longer will I leave you waiting for me. Together we will again feel, be as one–heart, mind, body; a soul.

Only Exception by Paramore Cover

Space Bound by Eminem Cover on Acoustic

She Won't Go

Lyrics

There's a girl I know

who acts like shadows on the wall
as she watches her life
pass her by.

She's swallowed by her pain,

that she will never show

'cause she's afraid
she'll never let him go

Even though, even though

she knows that he's a liar

can't be trusted, always busted 

fucking other girls.

[Chorus]

But she won't go

'cause she doesn't know
if she can be alone.

So she sits and waits,

praying for change

knowing it won't show.

I can see the pain inside you

the shattered heart in there

because of what's beside you

keeping you filled with fear.

Each night she comes home

hoping for a different story

but it's all the same, this foolish game

they always seem to play.

He starts a fight,

she can't do anything right

as spit hits her across the face

But he really loves her

as he puts her back in her place

[Chorus]

But she won't go

'cause she doesn't know
if she can be alone.

So she sits and waits
praying for change
knowing it won't show.

I can see the pain inside you,

the shattered heart in there

because of what's beside you

keeping you filled with fear.

So each night I lie awake

thinking of the different ways

she can rid this pain

and make it out alive.

But I know, oh yes I know

it's her choice not to go

and I can only hope

she makes it out alive.

Oh, girl you've got to go

you're not in this alone.

I'll be here right beside you.

I can see what's inside you.

Oh, but she won't go

'cause she doesn't know

if she can be alone.

So she sits and waits

praying for change

knowing it wont show.

You know that it won't show.

Catching Rainbows

I long to wake every morning
beside you, into a state of bliss.

Know my day will be fine
because at night I get to see this;

your handsome eyes staring
back at me and kiss your flawless lips.

Being with you I don’t fear
there is anything I’ll miss.

I know that you won’t hold me back,
but push me father than I imagined to go.

Just being with you is like catching a rainbow.

Because I have learned
love is all we really need.

Maybe, soon enough you’ll see
this the same way as me, at least

this is what I can hope and dream.

Don’t lose your chance with me,
you know I’m a rainbow too

and I won’t wait around forever,
waiting for you to love me too.

There are others trying to steal
the pot of gold from my rainbow.

So, don’t hide that treasure away,
come back to bed, say you’ll stay

and give me that beautiful
smile for just one more day.

The Mindful One

Lyrics

I lost myself in the bitterness of others
Forgot who I am, and who I want to be
Starting acting like the old me;
didn’t care enough about others, only me

But here I am today, I'm half a world away
and I’m seeing the better side of me
Cause I left it all behind, just for a little while
so I can return in days to come
as the mindful one

See when I was there, I just could not bear
the pain and drama of the others
I felt overwhelmed, stuck in an angry shell
not even a day away could help me escape

it couldn't help me escape

But here I am today, I'm half a world away
and I’m seeing the better side of me
Cause I left it all behind, just for a little while
so I can return in days to come
as the mindful one

the mindful one

So no fear my friends, I’ll be better in the end
And when I return I’ll be refreshed
Ready to take it all on again

But here I am today, I'm half a world away
and I’m seeing the better side of me
Cause I left it all behind, just for a little while
so I can return in days to come
as the mindful one
the mindful one

I'm gonna be the mindful one

A Surprising Feeling

There is a happiness that fills my heart
when thoughts of you fill my mind–
certain sunshine starts to shine
and my body seems to float away
amongst the clouds on a blue-sky
kind of day; feeling of laying
on top the ocean waves.

I’m here in the stars, sitting with the moon–
just a pen, paper and thoughts of you.

I’m on top the red wood trees,
on the lookout, searching for we.

And when I don’t see it, I finally see,
it isn’t you that is searching for me.
Because of this, there is no we, only
I and you– together we won't be.

But I still lay among these thick white clouds,
still listen to these crashing ocean waves
sitting in the sand, enjoying the day.

I still watch the moon with pen
and paper and thoughts of you–

write this poem down
in ink impermanent,
send it to those tree tops
for you
to one day find.

Smile For Me

Lyrics

Light breaks through the shades
falling perfectly on your face
as your eyes begin to make their climb

[Chorus]

And you smile
when your looking right at me
and I melt
because I love you can’t you see
and I don’t ever wanna lose you
don't ever wanna see you leave
so just keep smiling for me

Your hand touches my face
and you lift the hairs away

give me a smile that remains
as you pull me closer in

[Chorus]

and you smile
when your looking right at me
and I melt
because I love you can’t you see
and I don’t ever wanna lose you
don't ever wanna see you leave
so just keep smiling for me
yeah keep smiling for me

Because through your smiles
happiness floods through me
it’s the only way I can remain breathing

When you smile for me
and I know it’s me you see
yeah, I melt inside
because I love you, obviously
and I don’t ever wanna lose you
don't ever wanna see you leave
so just smiling for me
yeah, keep smile for me baby, smile for me

smile for me

I'm Me Because of You

Lyrics

Young love
thought you were the one
My search was over at 13
That is what I believed

Then I found out about her
and it shattered my world

[Chorus]

But that’s alright, I’m okay
I am much stronger today
Though you put me through this pain
I thank you for treating me this way
because I am me because of you

Oh you, oh oh oh

You weren’t just my mother
But my best friend
I knew you would be there till the end
That is what I believed

But then you showed me
when you decided suddenly to leave
Yeah, he’s more important than me

[Chorus]

But that’s alright, I’m okay
I am much stronger today
Though you put me through this pain
I thank you for treating me this way
Because I am me because of you

Oh you, because of you
ohh because of you

Then I was finally saved
True love and happiness came my way
That is what I believed

But every monster wears a mask
you lifted your’s quite fast
I finally saw it there
When you tried to take away my air

[Chorus]

But that’s alright, I’m okay
I am much stronger today
Though you put me through this pain
I thank you for treating me this way
because I am me because of you

Yeah, I'm me because of you

Oh you, because of you
ohh, because of you

Believe in Me

Lyrics

The light in your eyes
Is being taken by the dark
And I can see this all
Is breaking your heart

I may have done you wrong before

I was simply immature
But that girl, oh that girl
She is no more

So please, just forget that was even me
I don't know who I was supposed to be
Oh, can't you see
You got me begging on my knees
You really changed me baby, please
Just believe in me

A lie I've told before
But I will lie no more

I'm telling you from the bottom of my core
That I, I've never been more sure
No, I've never been more sure

So please, I'm asking you to trust in me

Let me prove I'm trustworthy

Oh, can't you see

You've got me begging on my knees

You've really changed me baby, please

Just believe in me
Oh believe in me
Please believe in me

Now we've fallen so out of love

Even though I wished
On the stars above, 

Oh, on the stars above

Why couldn't you just see it in me

That I was everything you need

I would have given you the world my baby

So please, just forget that we could ever be

I don't want you no more baby

Because you couldn't see

You had me begging on my knees

You really changed me baby, please

Oh, you shoulda just believed in me

Yeah, you shoulda just believed in me
Oh, you shoulda just believed in me

Then we'd be together baby

Thinking of You

Lyrics

It’s pitch black here
The moon won’t even shine
So I close my eyes
Your face appears

And I release a tear
As I feel that cold
by my side
It’s only blankets here

And I remember a time
When we were in love
Our happiness
Made the stars shine above

Yeah, from time to time
You cross my lonely mind
And I’m thinking of you
Late at night

Remembering all those times
you swore you were different
Yeah you know how
to treat a women like me

But reality Check
You’re just a fucking liar
A piece of shit
Like the rest of them but

From time to time
you cross my lonely mind
And I’m thinking of you
late at night

Remembering a time
when you proposed to me
and I cried
You just laughed

You must be fucking joking me
You’ve gotta be fucking kidding me
You’re an ass hole
That’s all you are

And I want you to know
yeah, I want you to know
I hope that you
Catch Aids